3 Things Christians Do That Non-Christians Despise
3 Things Christians Do That Non-Christians Despise
Spend two minutes talking to almost anyone outside the Christian faith and you’re almost certain to hear a list of complaints they have about Christians. The problem has been around awhile. As Mahatma Gandhi famously (and sadly) said: “I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ.” He’s not alone. The problem with many non-Christians isn’t that they don’t know any Christians. The challenge is they do.
So what gives? Many Christians would tell you we have an image problem: we’re treated unfairly, we’re being persecuted, or we’re just badly misunderstood. I’m not so sure. It’s not so much that Christians have an image problem. It’s far more likely that we have an integrity problem. Do we get misunderstood on some issues? Of course. But that’s outside our control. There are more than a few issues entirely within our control that give us a bad name with people outside Christianity.
Here are 3 things Christians do that non-Christians despise.
- JUDGE:
- It doesn’t take long for non-Christians to tell you how much they hate the way Christians judge other people. Another two minutes on social media will reveal Christians and preachers condemning unchurched people for their sexual habits and preferences, life-style choices and even political views. I doubt this is what Jesus had in mind when he gave his life in love for the world.
- Disclosure: without the mercy and intervention of Christ, I’m very judgmental. And years ago, I realized how devastating judgment and criticism can be to others. So I’m waging a life-long battle against it. Confessing it, repenting of it almost daily.
- I realized years ago that very few people get judged into life change. Far more get loved into it.
- It also occurred to me that the presence of judgment almost always guarantees an absence of love. Think about it through the lens of your marriage, a friendship or even someone you work with: it is virtually impossible to love someone and judge someone at the same time.
- But wait, you ask: what if they’re making a mistake and I need to correct them?
- First of all, look at your mistakes and the depth of your sin, and deal with your issues first. In the process, you’ll encounter a loving God who forgives you despite your rather egregious sin.
- And having been loved, you can love others.
- I try to remember this rule: If I’m judging someone, I’m not loving them. You can’t judge someone and love them at the same time. What would happen if Christians stopped judging the world (isn’t that God’s job?) and started loving it instead? I believe that’s what Jesus did.
- BE HYPOCRITICAL:
- There’s a word for Christian who say one thing and do another. The word is hypocrite. It’s far easier to call someone else a hypocrite than it is to admit you’re one.
- The truth is, that as much as I hate it, I’m a hypocrite. My walk doesn’t always match my talk. That’s why I don’t have a fish on my car. When I’m in a hurry and my natural impatience surfaces, the last thing some person God loves needs to see is a Christian cut him off. Of course, it’s worse than that. I’m not always a loving husband, kind father, steadfast son, patient boss, or even compassionate friend. Like you, I’m a mixture of good
- What did Paul say? Nothing good lives in me. Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord (Romans 7:18). That could be a life-verse for me. Well, actually, it kind of is.
- Sanctification is a process that never ends. I am not who I want to be (yet). I am not who God wants me to be. But I’m different. I’m changing. And Christ is at work in me. I believe that’s the reality for every person who calls Jesus Savior.
- So what do imperfect Christians do? I mean just deciding you’re not going to make mistakes never keeps you from making mistakes. I think the answer is simple: you watch what you say. Don’t pretend to be something or someone you’re not. I find the more humility I add to my words, the smaller the gap is between who I am and who I say I am.
- When you admit your shortcomings, you build a bridge between you and others. Owning your sin is different than living in it; confession is never an excuse for complacency.
- So, what do you do if you live in the tension between what you usually say or want to say and what you do? I think you change both. You change how you live through the power of Christ day by day (getting better), and at the same time, you change how you talk about your faith, yourself and how you live (adding more honestly and humility to your words).
- Want a quick fix for hypocrisy? Accelerate your walk. Humble your talk. Nothing closes the gap between word and action faster than that.
- STINK AT FRIENDSHIP
- Friendship is hard. We all have ideas of finding the perfect friends with whom we’ll never disagree, share 1000 common interests and ride off into the sunset with.
- Well, very few human relationships ever work that way. Even in marriage, the best marriages are almost always ones in which people have overcome deep and real obstacles to find a powerful love that’s far deeper than emotion.
- Perhaps the first obstacle between non-Christians and Christians is that relatively few Christians actively pursue meaningful friendships with people who don’t share their faith. Between churches that offer programs 5 nights a week (leaving little time for Christians to make friends outside the church) and Christians who are afraid of the world, many Christians don’t pursue authentic relationships with non-Christians. Which means much of the interaction non-Christians have is situational and observational rather than truly relational. They observe Christians in life and at work, notices traces of judgment and hypocrisy and draw all kinds of conclusions. I get that.
- But Jesus went so much deeper than that. Jesus pursued friendships with people who were different than him. Whose lifestyles were far different than anything God had in mind for them (or for people in relationship with him). Yet Jesus was their friend. He went to their house for dinner. They traveled together. They shared moments and meals and life. It scandalized the religious leaders of Jesus day, and sadly, when it’s practiced authentically, it still scandalizes most of us today.
- Think about it. When was the last time you hung out with a sex-worker? When was the last time you had someone who’s not your skin color, not your political persuasion and doesn’t share your value system over for dinner, or when was the last time you broke bread with an addict (who’s not in recovery)?
- Often when Christians do pursue ‘friendships’ with people far from God, it’s more of a project than it is a friendship. But people aren’t projects; people are people. People can smell it a mile away if you see them as a project, not a person. Even as you think about expanding the ministry of your church, if you see people as a means to an end, that’s a problem.
- Which leads us to another tension in our friendships with those outside the Christian faith. Some Christians do have a relationship with unchurched people. So: how exactly do you talk about faith? Great question!
- Most of us swing to one extreme or the other: either we always talk about faith, or we never talk about. Both are mistakes. Always talk about faith, and you’re turning the relationship into a project. Never talk about, and you miss the most important thing in life.
- Real friendships always drill down on real issues, and few things are more significant than the meaning of life. How do you talk about? Naturally, organically, in the context of your story is a great place to start.
- Real friendships are like that. Want a simpler place than that to begin? Try this. Just like the person. As much friend Reggie Joiner says, people will never believe you love them if they feel you don’t like them.
WHAT DO YOU THINK?
Anything you see that people who are not Christians despise about Christians? If you’re a Christian, what helps you overcome these issues, and what other issues do you struggle with?
When Times Are Tough
When Times Are Tough
Many of us may be feeling oppressed these days. With the global pandemic, hurricanes in the Gulf, and all of the unrest and division in our country; it is hard not to feel overwhelmed. There is great news. We have a place of security and safety we can run to. Actually, it is not a place. It is a person – Jesus Christ!
“The Lord also will be a stronghold for the oppressed, A stronghold in times of trouble;” Psalm 9:9 NASB
What is a stronghold, exactly? According to Webster, a stronghold is defined as 1) a fortified place; 2) a place of security or survival[1]. Jesus is our stronghold! When times are tough and we feel overwhelmed, Jesus is right there with us. He is in those times of trouble with us and will help us come through the tough times.
Did you notice the verse said, “times of trouble”, not just “time of trouble”? It’s because tough times come to us several times during our lives – it is not just a one-time event. Wouldn’t that be wonderful, if we only experienced trouble once in our lifetime and never faced it again! Unfortunately that’s not how this fallen world works. Trouble can come to us daily, and even many times a day. Trouble often comes unexpectedly, and at times it seems to be waiting for us around every corner.
Times of trouble come for all of us – no one is exempt- but when these times do come, we are not at their mercy. We know that He is also our stronghold, our refuge at all times. Jesus does not pick which troubles He will help with. He is a refuge to us each and every time we face trouble.
Are you feeling overwhelmed by the things going on around you? Are you facing financial difficulties, relationship issues, feelings of depression and hopelessness? There is a place of refuge, a stronghold you can run to for help. Jesus will make His presence your place of refuge. Go to Him and find help, safety, comfort, strength, guidance, whatever you need to make it through these times. You can’t seek His help too many times! There is no trouble too small for Him! It doesn’t matter how many times you go to Him because He wants you to come to Him.
So, again, if today you are in one of these tough times, remember you have a stronghold- Jesus!
[1] Merriam-Webster. (n.d.). Stronghold. In Merriam-Webster.com dictionary. Retrieved September 21, 2020, from https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/stronghold
What Would Jesus Do?
Do you remember the “WWJD” bracelets of the 90’s? Those letters stood for the question: “What Would Jesus Do?” Thirty years later, some think the answer is rioting, looting, and burning. A tweet from comic book artist Dean Trippe equating the violent riots to Jesus overturning the tables in the temple has gone viral and is (for some bizarre reason) gaining a lot of traction among Christians.
There is no similarity between that and the violence happening today. The comparison is ignorant on a number of levels. Trying to compare Jesus pointing out and removing the corruption from His temple to what is happening today shows an ignorance of what the Bible teaches completely. He is God and has every right to clean His own home. He didn’t violate anyone’s rights. It’s Jesus’ house He was cleansing! The idea that we could then turn that into looters going into other people’s houses and businesses and destroying them is absolute insanity and it shows a total ignorance of the biblical worldview. It was His house.
When we see people, that profess the name of Jesus, inciting riots and looting and trying to help with that and trying to put a Christian veneer over it, it breaks our hearts. God abhors racism and His Word is very clear about victims’ rights.
The only answer is Jesus! God is holy; we are sinners. We are rebels against a holy God. We deserve hell. And all these things we see in our nation right now is an expression of the evil and wickedness that comes from within people’s hearts. It’s coming from deep down within and the only escape from that is through repentance and faith in Jesus Christ.
Would you join with us in praying for a spiritual awakening and revival in the hearts of His people? Here is a list of Specific Prayers For Revival and Spiritual Awakening:[1]
- Ask God to bring deep conviction of sin, spiritual brokenness, a holy fear of God and genuine repentance among His people. There will be no revival without these elements and only God can produce them in His people. After all we cannot program or work up genuine brokenness and repentance. (2 Corinthians 7:10)
- Pray for deep cleansing, genuine repentance, and spiritual power to engulf pastors and Christian leaders. Revival and spiritual awakening are extremely unlikely without a mighty move of God in pastors and Christian leaders. Renewed pastors are absolutely crucial to a move of God in our day! (Ephesians 6:14-20)
- Pray for God to bestow spiritual hunger in His people and draw them to fervent intercession. God has to grant people the genuine faith and the fervent desire for prayer. With all our promotion and programming, we cannot “produce a genuine prayer movement. (Philippians 2:13)
- Pray that God will bring loving unity in our churches and a deep harmony between our churches. Many churches need healing among members and many churches need to stop competing jealously with other churches. (John 13:35)
- Pray for God to fill His people with a passion to see people saved. (Only God can give a genuine burden for souls.) Until God’s people intensely pray for the lost and do aggressive soul winning revival will tarry. Be sure you are constantly praying for many lost people by name. (Romans 9:1-3)
[1] https://www.absc.org/articles/10-specific-prayers-for-revival-spiritual-awakening/
“Tune My Heart”
I have been thinking. Having been a Worship Leader, I realized that we could get away with a lot in the first song each Sunday, if I really wanted. Very few would even notice. People are coming in late, trying to settle their kids, silencing their phones, checking their phones, wrapping up conversations, or just generally disoriented.
The truth is many of us walk into worship not quite ready to worship. We need a little time to center and focus ourselves. Some of us are frustrated with our kids. Some are disheartened about our work. Some are stressed about the demands of school or the deadlines of our jobs. Others are depressed or apathetic about life. Yet others are fearful, distraught, or mourning. Weekly worship calls us back into a story with the emotional highs and lows of sin and salvation, so we all need to recalibrate.
The beginning of worship is a critical moment when we release everything else demanding our attention into the capable hands of the very One we are preparing to encounter.
Tune My Heart
Some historic hymns seem to run on an endless tank of fuel. No matter how many times we sing them, they speak to us, stir us, and lead us to worship. “Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing” is one of those hymns for me.
Come, thou fount of every blessing,
Tune my heart to sing thy grace.
Tune my heart. It’s like guitar in its case, or left out on a stand, it’s not the same guitar. When it is picked up a few days later and strummed, it’s out of tune. Because of forces inside (wood, tension, aging strings) and forces outside (temperature, humidity), a guitar left alone will always fall out of tune.
The same phenomenon happens in our hearts. Between Sundays, we get knocked around, and the forces inside and outside of us — our sin, others’ sin, and the fallenness of the world — send our hearts in all kinds of directions. When we come back to worship together, and the Holy Spirit begins to strum the strings of our hearts, we hear dissonance. Hearts always require re-tuning.
Because this kind of calibration is critical, but can be difficult, consider a few tips for how to prepare your hearts well for worship.
Worship starts before you enter.
As many have said before, we don’t enter into corporate worship and begin to worship. We come into the space already worshiping. Our hearts have been loving and desiring in all kinds of directions this week. The first step is to simply recognize and confess that fact, praying that the Holy Spirit would increasingly narrow the gap between the worship offered on Sundays and the worship offered Mondays through Saturdays. The worshiper who grows in orienting their heart toward God Monday through Saturday (whole-life worship) will find themselves more calibrated for Sundays (gathered worship).
Center your heart before worship.
Before a worship service, all of us can do things that make entrance into worship easier. We can meditate on a verse or two in Scripture or pray through a psalm. We can listen to music that stirs and orients our hearts. Perhaps just ten minutes of quiet is what we need. Certainly turning our phone to “do not disturb” (or even off) can be a helpful, intentional practice to calm our frayed, distracted minds.
Arrive early.
Few things make it harder to fully engage in worship than arriving just on time or late. Arriving early gives us plenty of time to find a place to sit, and then center our hearts through the word and prayer.
We’ll also have a chance to prepare for worship by greeting others. Some people think the only way to prepare for worship is to quietly pray and ignore everyone else. That’s a one-dimensional way to approach worship. Because worship is both vertical (us and God) and horizontal (one another), greeting the people worshiping next to you is a wonderful way to calibrate your heart for corporate worship.
Make the most of the first moments.
Jump into the deep end. Let the call to worship and the opening hymns or songs flood your mind and heart. Sing loudly, breathe deeply, feel passionately. Sometimes, participating physically actually leads our affections to engage spiritually. Recognize that the opening of worship is meant for our calibration, and let it prepare our hearts to worship.
Pure Worship
Going organic has become all the rage now. People are more than willing to drive the extra mile and pay the extra money for it. The dictionary defines organic as “constitutional or inherent in the basic structure of something; fundamental.”1 So those who take those extra steps to get it want to be assured of getting a product that is as close to nature as possible from a source they trust. They also, more than likely, handle it in such a way as to protect its purity.
This got me thinking; “What if we applied this “organic” concept to our worship – what would it look like? How could we have worship that’s pure, untainted – as God intended?”
Organic worship would be a worship that is grounded and nourished in the Word of God. It is where we experience His love, learn His ways, and discover His purposes. It’s where we hear the story of His pursuit of us and His call for us to pursue Him. It is also where we learn how to live a life that is pleasing to Him. Allowing the Spirit to guide our day-to-day life, including our worship.
“How do we pursue this organic worship?” Here are a few steps that will help:
- Do our homework: Know what the Bible teaches regarding God, your relationship to Him, and worship.
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- “Like newborn babies, long for the pure milk of the word, so that by it you may grow in respect to salvation” 1 Pet.2:2 NASB.
- “O send out Your light and Your truth, let them lead me; Let them bring me to Your holy hill And to Your dwelling places” Psalm 43:3 NASB.
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- Pay attention to the source: Allow the Holy Spirit to reign in your life and trust His guidance of your worship.
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- “Therefore I urge you, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service of worship” Romans 12:1 NASB.
- “But an hour is coming, and now is, when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth; for such people the Father seeks to be His worshipers. God is spirit, and those who worship Him must worship in spirit and truth” John 4:23-24.
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- Don’t taint it: Pursue a pure, singular focus on God Almighty in worship.
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- “Who may ascend into the hill of the LORD? And who may stand in His holy place? He who has clean hands and a pure heart, Who has not lifted up his soul to falsehood And has not sworn deceitfully. He shall receive a blessing from the LORD And righteousness from the God of his salvation” Psalm 24:3-5 NASB
- “And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect” Romans 12:2 NASB.
- “For we are the true circumcision, who worship in the Spirit of God and glory in Christ Jesus and put no confidence in the flesh” Philippians 3:3 NASB
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- Pay the price: Sacrifice the time and attention necessary to pursue an intimate relationship with God and to worship Him.
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- “Through Him then, let us continually offer up a sacrifice of praise to God, that is, the fruit of lips that give thanks to His name” Hebrews 13:15 NASB.
- “Willingly I will sacrifice to You; I will give thanks to Your name, O LORD, for it is good” Psalm 54:6 NASB.
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1 – https://www.vocabulary.com/dictionary/organic
My Relationship With God Is Cold
My Relationship With God Is Cold
“How did you get close to God again? I’m not sinning, like doing drugs or drinking or swearing, but I get mad easily and don’t feel that connection with God. I just want my relationship with God back.”
If you are a mature believer, questions like this may be familiar. Here is an answer that has worked for me.
Do what the early church did.
“42 They were continually devoting themselves to the apostles’ teaching and to fellowship, to the breaking of bread and to prayer.” Acts 2:42 NASB
- Devote yourself to the apostles teaching — study the Bible regularly
- Devote yourself to the fellowship — don’t go it alone. We need one another. We need the accountability of the body and we need to share our time and stuff with one another in sacrificial ways.
- Devote yourself to the breaking of bread — again, we need to worship the King together. We need to remember the sacrifice of the cross together with other believers.
- Devote yourself to “the prayers” — the text and most modern translations say “prayers” not “prayer”. The plural is important. Most scholars will say that the meaning is not just to “saying your prayers” or praying and talking to God regularly. The plural has a very specific referent. Either it means the 3x a day pattern of Jewish prayer in the first century or, and more likely, it means they devoted themselves to the prayer book of the Old Testament, the book of Psalms.
My own experience is, that when my walk with God has grown cold or lukewarm, doing these things restores my passion and appreciation for the wonders of the gospel and the beauty of my Savior.
Give it time. Doing these things is not a shot of adrenaline. They are exercises for your spirit and will “pay off” over time (just like physical exercise) as you continually make the “devote yourself” investment.
Ask yourself this question, what commands of Christ am I not doing that I know I ought to be doing? Why this question?
Look at John 14:21
“21 He who has My commandments and keeps them is the one who loves Me; and he who loves Me will be loved by My Father, and I will love him and will disclose Myself to him.” NASB
Jesus ties further revelation of himself, greater intimacy with himself to our obedience to the commands he has given us.
Look at Galatians 2:20
“ 20 I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and a]the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself up for me.” NASB
Live your life by faith not by how you feel.
Train your heart to act on truth revealed not how you feel in the moment.
Finally, check out your love life?
Read Luke 7:38–50, especially verse 47.
“ 47 For this reason I say to you, her sins, which are many, have been forgiven, for she loved much; but he who is forgiven little, loves little.” NASB
UpSide Down
Upside Down
Are There Ways To Worship God Other Than Musically?
“Are There Ways To Worship God That Do Not Include Music Or Singing?”
When many of us hear ‘worship God’, we equate it to corporate, musical worship in a church service. While this is an important aspect of worship, it is only one of many ways we can ascribe worth to God.
Romans 12:1 “Therefore I urge you, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service of worship.”
God desires that we give Him our full attention, adoration, and time. Everything we do in life should be an act of worship to Him because of all He has done for us. In John 4, Jesus calls us to “Worship in Spirit and in Truth.” Jesus tells us that we are to worship the truth of who He is no matter where we are and no matter what we are doing.
While there are many ways to worship God outside of musical worship, let’s look at three key ways we can worship God with our whole lives: prayer, service, and giving.
Prayer
Prayer is very important to God because it is a way for us to love Him back through communication. Chronicles 16:28 says, “Ascribe to the LORD glory and strength.” God wants us to directly come before Him and recognize all He has done for us. 1 Thessalonians 5:17 tells us to never stop praying. This means that we should be constantly communicating with God in prayer throughout our day.
Serving
This not only includes how we serve in our church, but how we serve people outside of it. If we are followers of Jesus, we are following a Servant. Galatians 5:13 commands us to serve one another in love. When we choose to intentionally love and serve other people, we are also loving and serving God. Always be looking for ways to serve more in our church, community, and family.
Giving
There are countless Bible verses about how we give; but they inherently have the same message: Give to others because God gave to you. While giving financially is very important, money is not the only thing that we can give. We can also give of our time and our talents. Regardless of what we are giving, here are three tips to help us give well:
- Give Sacrificially
- Give Regularly
- Give Proportionately
God has blessed us with many things, so He is pleased when we turn around and give to others. It doesn’t matter how much money, time, or talents we have, we can all give something. Only we know how generous we can be with the things that God has given us.
You can worship God with your life in these ways, as well as countless others. If you are unsure how to worship him throughout each day, begin by asking in prayer.
Kingdom Manhood | Tony Evans
One kingdom man whom you may not have heard about is found in the Old Testament book of Judges. If a poll was taken of most people in church today, probably not even a quarter would recognize his name. This man didn’t get much airtime as compared to the likes of Samson, David, or Joshua. Yet the principles found in the two verses about him hold the potential to not only transform lives, but our world. Because, as you will see, it only took one real man named Shamgar to save the entire nation of Israel.
First we read in Judges 5:6,
“In the days of Shamgar the son of Anath,
In the days of Jael, the highways were deserted,
And travelers went by roundabout ways.”Judges 5:6
The reason why a nation resorts to traveling its back roads is because it has lost control of its front ones. So to be out in public was to put your life at risk. This was a day of terrorism and chaos when marauding bands of irresponsible men created havoc in the society.
But then we read in Judges 3:31,
“After him came Shamgar the son of Anath, who struck down six hundred Philistines with an oxgoad; and he also saved Israel.”Judges 3:31
Shamgar, whom we know today as the third minor judge in the history of Israel, probably came from very humble beginnings. In fact, he very likely started out as a farmer, becoming proficient at handling an oxgoad, or cattle prod, while living in an agrarian society. But what’s critical to learn from him is that he didn’t wait until he became great in order to do something great. He didn’t put off until next week what he needed to do that day.
Shamgar saved the entire nation of Israel, and he did it as a farmer! God used Shamgar because he exemplified two of the greatest principles of being a kingdom man:
- Start where you are
- Use what you have
Imagine what our homes, churches, communities, and nation would be like today if our men would take a lesson from the life of kingdom men like Shamgar. When a kingdom man steps out his door each day, heaven, earth and hell ought to take notice.
